Al-Anon has long since known what medical professionals are only recently coming to understand; that alcoholism is a “family illness” which can, and most often does, cause serious emotional, psychological and even physical effects on the family and friends of the alcoholic or problem drinker. It is a fact that more and more therapists, psychologists, social workers and other health professionals are recommending Al-Anon as a crucial aid in recovery for those affected by the disease.
A disturbing estimation is that possibly as much as 15% of the US population could be considered “problem drinkers” and within that group, there is another percentage that may in fact be clinical alcoholics. The good news is that we in Al-Anon don’t need to understand those differences nor the statistics, that’s best left for the professionals to decide.
All we need to understand are “the 3 C’s”, which are:
There are so many answers to that question but some simple explanations can include; lack of understanding of the disease, being too afraid to admit there is a problem, embarrassment that friends and neighbors won’t understand, concerns that the “label” will cause you to become a social outcast…and the list goes on…
BUT THERE IS HOPE ~ YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
Many others are quietly hiding away the “dirty little secret”, suffering and slowly dying from the pain, anger, frustration, depression, and resentment that come as a direct result of the family disease of alcoholism. Only after those feelings become too overwhelming are we willing to look for help, only after our lives become completely unmanageable and out of pure desperation are we able to search for another, better way to cope with our situation. The tools that Al-Anon offer can play a life-changing role for you - so let’s start by learning a bit more about the disease of alcoholism and help you begin your own journey towards recovery.
So what is alcoholism?By definition, alcoholism is an addiction to the consumption of alcoholic liquor, or the mental illness and compulsive behavior resulting from alcohol dependency.
As the definition makes clear, and by the experiences of Al-Anon members whom can quickly attest to, alcoholism and the related mental illness(s) tend to go hand in hand. For the alcoholic, it is an uncontrollable urge to drink. Alcoholics physiologically crave the alcohol due to a brain chemistry that is different from the average person, it’s an addiction, a chemical dependency. This is NOT something they have any control over. Some experts have considered the alcoholics' reaction to drinking as something like an allergy to the alcohol itself; just as some people are allergic to bee stings and can suffer fatal consequences, the theory in this school of thought is that some are allergic to alcohol and their reactions to it can be equally life-threatening both in short and long term.
The point is that alcoholics don’t drink because they don’t love you, nor do they drink because they don’t care about your feelings, or even because they are trying to punish you in some way. Instead, they drink quite simply because their brain is just wired a little different than the rest of us and doesn’t have the capacity to control the urges to drink. By that same token, the alcoholic either can’t recognize the harmful effects caused by their drinking, or they simply are incapable of stopping the problem regardless of their level of desire or willpower.
Alcoholism is a progressive disease, which means it will worsen with time.There is no cure for alcoholism but just as there are ways to manage diabetes, alcoholics can learn to manage their illness as well, but only if willing and that decision can come only from the alcoholic. There is no other person in the world that can convince an alcoholic that he or she has the disease, nor can anyone convince that person that they need help…this truly must come from the alcoholic and this is one of the things we learn in Al-Anon.
Is “problem drinking” different than alcoholism? Problem drinking is generally defined as, a person who uses alcohol in ways that are harmful to themselves or to others. People who are problem drinkers may have the disease of alcoholism or may drink in ways that lead to health or safety problems for themselves or others.
Obviously this definition is much broader than that of alcoholism but it’s extremely important to notice the key elements of this definition; harmful to themselves OR to others – health and safety problems for themselves OR others. Family and friends of the problem drinker are the “others” so by definition, you too are equally at risk of being harmed physically, emotionally and psychologically even though you yourself are not the drinker.
Most are not qualified to make a diagnosis as to whether a problem drinker is an alcoholic and others are simply not comfortable in making a claim that their loved one may be an alcoholic. The important thing to remember is that we don’t have to know the answers to this question at all; the only thing we need to ask ourselves is whether the drinking is causing a problem for us.
Still not sure if you’ve been affected by the family disease of alcoholism? Try taking one of these simple 20 question quizzes to see if Al-Anon can help in your situation:
CONTINUE TO STEP 2
If you answered YES TO JUST ONE of the questions in any of the quizzes, Al-Anon can surely help and we encourage you to learn more about our program and consider attending a meeting…
A disturbing estimation is that possibly as much as 15% of the US population could be considered “problem drinkers” and within that group, there is another percentage that may in fact be clinical alcoholics. The good news is that we in Al-Anon don’t need to understand those differences nor the statistics, that’s best left for the professionals to decide.
All we need to understand are “the 3 C’s”, which are:
- We didn’t cause it – it is not our fault that the other person drinks, it is their private battle
- We can’t control it – we have no power over the other person's desire to drink
- We can’t cure it – it is an illness that cannot be cured through any known medical remedies
There are so many answers to that question but some simple explanations can include; lack of understanding of the disease, being too afraid to admit there is a problem, embarrassment that friends and neighbors won’t understand, concerns that the “label” will cause you to become a social outcast…and the list goes on…
BUT THERE IS HOPE ~ YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
Many others are quietly hiding away the “dirty little secret”, suffering and slowly dying from the pain, anger, frustration, depression, and resentment that come as a direct result of the family disease of alcoholism. Only after those feelings become too overwhelming are we willing to look for help, only after our lives become completely unmanageable and out of pure desperation are we able to search for another, better way to cope with our situation. The tools that Al-Anon offer can play a life-changing role for you - so let’s start by learning a bit more about the disease of alcoholism and help you begin your own journey towards recovery.
So what is alcoholism?By definition, alcoholism is an addiction to the consumption of alcoholic liquor, or the mental illness and compulsive behavior resulting from alcohol dependency.
As the definition makes clear, and by the experiences of Al-Anon members whom can quickly attest to, alcoholism and the related mental illness(s) tend to go hand in hand. For the alcoholic, it is an uncontrollable urge to drink. Alcoholics physiologically crave the alcohol due to a brain chemistry that is different from the average person, it’s an addiction, a chemical dependency. This is NOT something they have any control over. Some experts have considered the alcoholics' reaction to drinking as something like an allergy to the alcohol itself; just as some people are allergic to bee stings and can suffer fatal consequences, the theory in this school of thought is that some are allergic to alcohol and their reactions to it can be equally life-threatening both in short and long term.
The point is that alcoholics don’t drink because they don’t love you, nor do they drink because they don’t care about your feelings, or even because they are trying to punish you in some way. Instead, they drink quite simply because their brain is just wired a little different than the rest of us and doesn’t have the capacity to control the urges to drink. By that same token, the alcoholic either can’t recognize the harmful effects caused by their drinking, or they simply are incapable of stopping the problem regardless of their level of desire or willpower.
Alcoholism is a progressive disease, which means it will worsen with time.There is no cure for alcoholism but just as there are ways to manage diabetes, alcoholics can learn to manage their illness as well, but only if willing and that decision can come only from the alcoholic. There is no other person in the world that can convince an alcoholic that he or she has the disease, nor can anyone convince that person that they need help…this truly must come from the alcoholic and this is one of the things we learn in Al-Anon.
Is “problem drinking” different than alcoholism? Problem drinking is generally defined as, a person who uses alcohol in ways that are harmful to themselves or to others. People who are problem drinkers may have the disease of alcoholism or may drink in ways that lead to health or safety problems for themselves or others.
Obviously this definition is much broader than that of alcoholism but it’s extremely important to notice the key elements of this definition; harmful to themselves OR to others – health and safety problems for themselves OR others. Family and friends of the problem drinker are the “others” so by definition, you too are equally at risk of being harmed physically, emotionally and psychologically even though you yourself are not the drinker.
Most are not qualified to make a diagnosis as to whether a problem drinker is an alcoholic and others are simply not comfortable in making a claim that their loved one may be an alcoholic. The important thing to remember is that we don’t have to know the answers to this question at all; the only thing we need to ask ourselves is whether the drinking is causing a problem for us.
Still not sure if you’ve been affected by the family disease of alcoholism? Try taking one of these simple 20 question quizzes to see if Al-Anon can help in your situation:
- How can you tell if you have you been affected by someone else’s drinking?
- Are you an adult who in childhood, grew up with a problem drinker?
- Are you a teenager (19 years old or younger) who lives with a problem drinker at home? (Alateen)
CONTINUE TO STEP 2
If you answered YES TO JUST ONE of the questions in any of the quizzes, Al-Anon can surely help and we encourage you to learn more about our program and consider attending a meeting…